Last Saturday, Nate and I went to our friend’s sister debut. It was fun. Though we know that the two of us were the oldest of the bunch, it’s always nice seeing young adults party their heart out.
I was so drunk that night. We drank a lot – tequila, tanduay ice, and empi lights, haist, it was really flowing with alcohol and we cannot help it.
After talking about our personal stuff, I opened this conversation with Nate.
Me: Nate, nag kwa-quarter life ka na ba?
Nate: Ano un?
Me: alam mo yung feeling na parang at your age hindi mo pa naaachieve ang mga bagay na gusto mo talaga.
Nate: Ahm, hindi naman, kasi hindi naman talaga ako mapanghangad sa mga bagay we. Masaya na ako na may work kami, okay ang mga family ko, ganoon.
This is what I love about Nate. I know that all of his decisions, they all involved his family. I am always at his house so I know, that is why I love staying at their place. He continued.
Nate: Alam mo kasi ang problem sa iyo, kailangan mo na ng partner. Kahit na aminin mo na okay ka lang, malungkot pa din. Hindi na iyon tipo dahil sa attraction or because of sex, pero siyempre at our age, we need to have someone na. Companionship baga.
True. I was drunk and I know I will be more courageous to say my side.
Me: I know naman. Sometimes, I get sad din. Hindi mo lang alam kung gaano ko na gustong magkaroon ng someone. Parang ang sarap ng may constant na kasama sa mga lakad, kumain, at magbyahe na kayong dalawa lang. Gusto ko din un, gustong gusto. Pero sa tingin ko naman, God has always been good to me. He balance things out. I am happy with my family, friends, and work. He keeps me preoccupied kaya siguro hindi ko madalas nararamdaman ung longing for someone na feeling. Pati ngayon, I feel so bless with everything I have now, na ang kinakatakot ko lang, if he gives me that perfect someone, he will challenge me more. Not that I am scared, I know he will always be there for me, he will not give me something I can’t handle. Pero at this point, wag muna, I cannot afford a bigger challenge, kaya siguro wala pa din.Im happy naman we. :)
Nate just said okay. :p
That’s me when drunk, I realize how emotional I am, and how vulnerable and weak I can get.